Runnin’ hard into 2019

I realize that it has been, literally, months since I’ve written in this space and for that, I apologize to any and all (two of you) who might have missed it. I mean truly, I almost forgot how to publish to the site. My paying gigs have been pretty hectic, a fun new project popped up, and my creative tank has been somewhat depleted by 9 p.m. But just like the 10 pounds I lost before Christmas, I’m back, baby! Just in time to put my resolutions out there. You know I get giddy over goals.

This year, I didn’t want to paint in broad strokes. Sure, I’d like to give up sugar, meditate regularly and journal more, but I find those bold declarations only seem to leave room for ambiguity and abandonment. I have three clear cut objectives I’d like to check off in 2019. So let’s make them official, shall we?

Complete a 20-mile trail race

Crazy, right? It’s the scariest, so I’m putting it at the top of this list. This one has actually been a long time coming for me. I’ve admired a handful of friends and acquaintances from afar as they trudged through mud and darkness and completed these crazy 50- and 100-mile ultras. Since the farthest I’ve ever walked or run is 13.1 miles, 50 seemed a bit extreme, and 100 wasn’t even a consideration for this mama.

But then, in November, I asked my brother, Matt, to do a little trail race with me for my birthday. It was short – just 4 miles – but I L-O-V-Ed it. I came off that windy path high as hell and hungry for more. Due to a series of unfortunate events, Matt didn’t actually finish. (It’s a story that can only be told over drinks and with his formal consent. It’s that good.)  I think he felt like he had some unfinished business.

When Christmas rolled around, I decided to give him the gift of sweet redemption and the biggest mile tally either of us will (hopefully) ever complete – a 20-mile trail race at the end of April. I printed off our registration confirmations and shoved them in a bag with a pair of compression socks. After he opened it, we exchanged looks of simultaneous terror and exhilaration. Our 18-week training plan is already underway, and I’m feeling … we’ll call it tentatively optimistic.   

Finish a first draft of my book

For as long as I can remember, I’ve had this romantic fantasy about running off to a rustic cabin in a field of wildflowers, my laptop resting on a handmade wooden desk, and letting a poetic narrative flow through my fingertips. See: Colin Firth’s setup in Love Actually.

But as the years have come and gone, I’ve had to come to the realization that there is no she shed in my immediate future. My extracurricular writing situation involves me hunched over a bright light in a dark room with a 4-year-old leaning on my left arm and the slow onset of melatonin dulling my words as the minutes tick by. If I can’t manifest a book in those circumstances, I’ll just never do it.

Then, a few months back, I had an idea for a plot. A fictional plot inspired by a hodgepodge of real life events, which surprised me because my wheelhouse has been exclusively nonfiction. I decided to start working on it, a few pages here and a few pages there. I took advantage of uneventful Friday nights and slow Sundays. I have seven chapters, and I’d love to bring the whole thing home in 2019. Then, I don’t know … tuck it away somewhere until I figure out what comes next with those things.

Hit my goal weight

I know this seems broad and unfocused, but I’ve had this one stupid number in my head for ten years now. Maybe even longer, if I’m honest with myself. I got close before the holidays, when I was religiously counting my macros, but from the time the turkey showed up, it all went to hell in a hamburger bun.

Hank and I will begin our annual Whole30 extravaganza tomorrow and I’ll be reuniting with my friends, myfitnesspal and intermittent fasting, to kick things off. I know I can get there if I can just remember why I want it.

Rapid fire resolutions on my radar for the new year:

Cultivate more thoughtful spaces. This includes finally setting up a writing nook in my living room and new flooring on the first floor. We’ve lived in our home for more than seven years and it still looks like we’re debating on whether or not we’re going to stay. I largely attribute this to the fact we don’t have cable, so I only watch HGTV in urgent care waiting rooms. This resolution also entails less purchasing of all the things.

Cutting out the negativity. Some situations just really suck my soul dry. Like hooking up my heart to a turbo powered joy vacuum. Whenever possible, I find it best to sidestep these scenarios and someones and go find the sunshine. Less suck. More sun.

I’d like to expand my culinary efforts a tad, maybe try my hand at bread baking (tell me you follow Jenna Fischer’s Instagram stories) and pastries from scratch. I’m the mom who buys the brownies instead of baking them, and I’m OK with that, but The Great British Baking Show has me crushin’ hard on the thought of digging into some dough.

Soak up these sweet years with my chicks and their dad.

Always keep a book in my purse.

Find more ways to lower my environmental impact.

Celebrate all the good.